As we prepare for the new year , we turn a new leaf in our history and shift our ground and look in. The first few things that need changing are our toxic relationships of 2015. Getting rid of them will make us mentally strong.
1. Relationships Run by One Person
A relationship is toxic when one person calls all the shots. It is very tempting to look for someone in life to take control and alleviate pressure. If you put a collar over your neck and hand the leash to someone else, you will have no say about where they lead you in life…and that is toxic. Here are few tips from Judge Lynn:
2. Relationships that Complete You
In the societies we are raised in, we are often taught to meet “the one” because that person will lift us out of our misery and elevate us into a state of perpetual wholeness or bliss. It’ is not our partner’s job to make us feel joyful and whole and to fill any gaps and voids. In 2016, you need to take responsibility for any voids or gaps present in your life. No one else!
3. Relationships Based on Unrealistic Expectations
You do not enjoy the company of someone because they are perfect, you appreciate them in spite of the fact they are not perfect beings. So if you are striving for perfection – that is a deadly fantasy that none of us will ever be able to achieve. Everyone should be perfectly imperfect and it will remain that way for the remainder of their lives. The biggest disappointments in life and in relationships are the result of unrealistic expectations. This should be avoided in 2016!
4. Relationships with Lots of Anger and Resentment
Do you know a person who is always “reacting” almost aggressively to situations that happen to them or the both of you? A person who always seems irritated about something that you do. They tend to respond to even mild confrontations with personal attacks. 2016 may be the year to cut them loose.
5. Relationships Based on Envy
All of us know a person who gaily watches someone else fail or gossips about the professed failings of others. Disgruntled in their own lives, they focus on people not “in their circle” and must have an audience to listen to their rants. Once someone is “on their radar” they will pick apart every aspect of that person’s life from their appearance to their relationships to the job they do. Negativity must stop in 2016! It’s toxic.
6. Relations Lacking Respect
The feeling of being disrespected is one of the worst things that could happen to you or anyone for that matter. Who has any tolerance for disrespectful people? No one does, actually! In 2016, close the door on the people who disrespect you until they learn to treat you with the courteousness you deserve and have earned.
7. Relationships that Hold you Back
We all have a fear of “leaving people behind,” but what do you do if people really seem to be holding you back? Here is what you can do to cut the cord to a relationship that is holding you back in 8 easy steps:
#1: First, identify problem areas. What holds you back the most right now? Tackle it.
#2: Choose to stop giving your time and energy to people who hold you back.
#3: Have compassion. Everyone is at a different step, so be aware of how you act.
#4: Forgive. We all need time to figure things out, so believe in redemption and second chances.
#5: Be respectful. When in doubt, take people at face value and honor their opinions.
#6: Go offline. Facebook can be a worst offender for perpetuating misery. Perhaps take a walk or visit someone who loves you for who you are.
#7: Move yourself. You may need to physically move your location. Exercise helps too.
#8: Ready, fire, aim. Worry can emotionally paralyze you. Sometimes, just DO!
8. Relationships that Can’t get Past the Past Mistakes
If someone is always bringing up your past mistakes to give good reason for their actions, you’re in a toxic relationship that needs to be discontinued in 2016. Again, no one is perfect. Your friends, partners and family members shouldn’t use your past as a way to manipulate you.
9. Relationships with Manipulators
Manipulators suck time and energy out of your life and disguise it as friendship. They can be tricky to deal with because they treat you “nicely”. They know what you like, what makes you content, and what you think is hilarious, but the difference is that they use this information to their own pleasure. Stop this toxicity in 2016. Watch this video to learn how to deal with manipulators.
10. Relationships that Stay within Comfort Zone
If we wish to live a life of adventure, then those who aren’t adventurous need be avoided. All those you meet and come across in your life are partners on your journey, if only for a few seconds or minutes. Those we keep around more regularly end up steering our direction more than we realize. If you hope to leave your comfort zone regularly, then do not hang out with those who aren’t willing to leave theirs.