Apple has approved a lot of questionable apps. Even with Apple’s strict guidelines, you wonder how they ever got onto iTUNES. In this article, I examine 10 of the most horrible, offensive and useless apps ever created for the iPhone that need to be banned, if they haven’t been already.
10. Pocket Heat
Release Date: January, 2010
Banned: April, 2013
No one wants to be in a position where they need more heat because they are cold. Pocket Heat used to drain your battery and overheat your iPhone to keep your hands warm, but now it’s just a “faux heater” that does its “best to heat you up using nothing more than pixels and sound waves”. It looks like Apple wasn’t happy about people turning their iPhones into portable heaters and banned the app in April 2013. One major complaint against it: it drained the battery with unmatched speed.
9. Girls Around Me
Release Date: Unknown
Using publicly available information such as Facebook and Foursquare check-ins, Girls Around Me took the users to places where they can find girls nearby. It stirred up criticism about privacy and safety for people not necessarily aware of how their information could be abused, so it got banned. It was voluntarily pulled after Privacy Backlash.
Release Date: December, 2008
Banned: Still available
iAmAMan by IPS Pirates doesn’t deserved to be banned, but it has ruffled a lot of feathers of its users. The app allows men to track their girlfriend’s menstrual cycle and “helps to avoid misunderstandings and preserve your relationship.” The app has received criticism for allowing the tracking of several women at the same time, and for claiming it can help men predict their girlfriend’s “mood” so they can “save money” on dates.
7. I Am Rich
Release Date: August 5, 2008
Banned: August 6, 2008
Armin Heinrich’s $1,000 app allowed crazisome iPhone users to download a glowing red gem that contained a secret rich person’s mantra. The app’s official description called it “a work of art with no hidden function at all”. The app was pulled by Apple without explanation the day after being released. Android owners can now download it for free through Google Play. The price was definitely outrageous!
6. Obama Trampoline
Release Date: January, 2009
You can select one of 18 politicians-from President Barack Obama to Sarah Palin-and use the iPhone’s accelerometer to bounce around the Oval Office and pop random balloons. It was banned because Apple felt the app violated a clause in the iPhone developer’s terms of service agreement, which states apps may not ridicule politicians. Lol!
Release Date: August, 2009
Banned: Still available
This app promises to keep pesky teenagers off your lawn by transmitting “irritatingly high frequency sounds that most adults” can’t hear. The app’s users reviews warn of being ripped off. Even the screenshots of this app are offensive.
4. Super Monster Bros by Adventure Time Pocket Free
Release Date: February 23, 2013
Super Monster Bros by Adventure Time Pocket Free (yes, that’s the actual full name) is considered one of the worst games ever released for iOS devices. The game became an internet sensation after IGN posted a video about its absurd in-app purchases and blatant rip off of Pokémon and Mario Bros. The game asked players to spend up to $100 to unlock additional characters while ripping off some of Nintendo’s most popular franchises.
3. Pet Baby
Release Date: August 02, 2012
Banned: Still available
Pet Baby is not only irrelevant to most users, but it has to be one of the creepiest and awkward apps ever created. The app allows you to turn your pet into a science fiction nightmare by merging its face with that of a human. I keep imagining some insane person with 200 framed human-cat hybrid images decorating their walls.
#2. Phone Story
Release Date: September 9, 2011
Banned: September 13, 2011
Phone Story claims to be “an educational game about the dark side of your favorite smart phone,” but Apple didn’t see it that way. Apple banned the app for violating their developer guidelines, but some questioned the validity of their claim. The game features four minigames where players must force children to mine coltan, and stop employees from committing suicide. It is debatable if this game is in poor taste, or really educating people as the creators claim it does. You can read more about the game at PhoneStory.org.
1. Baby Shaker
Release Date: April, 2009
Banned: April, 2009
In 2009, Apple was forced to apologize for the Baby Shaker application after it gained criticism in the media. It only took Apple a few days to pull the app, but the damage was done. The game required users to silence a crying baby by shaking it to death. Check out the video to see how it worked; disgusting? Apple needs to revamp its app approval process, period.
About Alex Noudelman
Alex Noudelman is an educator, coach and Digital Marketing Manager with over 5 years of experience. Alex enjoys and strives to motivate others to better themselves professionally and one a personal note. Feel free to contact him if you have any questions or would like a specific topic covered.